I Promised My Boyfriend I Wouldn’t Buy Any More Winter Coats — He’s About to Be Disappointed

Welcome, readers, to my favourite time of the year. We’re in that sweet spot when wearing layers is still a novelty and—as I’ve written before—looking good is as easy as investing in a good coat and a decent pair of shades. November is, as my friend Liam once said, “a month when everyone can look hot”.

Never has this been truer than Emily Ratajkowski sauntering through the streets of New York in a cherry-red Charlotte Simone coat, bare legs, and black boots. Although to be fair, she has an unfair advantage, being an indisputably “hot” person who needn’t rely on a good jacket and sunglasses. Who else could style out a soiled poo bag? For the rest of us, it’s worth taking note of this winning outfit formula, which I have gone to the effort of replicating below.

A very good autumn look

Before, I go any further, some context: I write this from my living room-cum-office where, to my left lies a pile of winter coats stuffed (lovingly) behind the sofa and, crucially, out of sight of my long-suffering boyfriend who has already relinquished much of his wardrobe to my coat collection. I have a gargantuan faux fur coat sploshed with shades of pistachio, violet, and pink, a floor-sweeping fake mink, a zebra swing jacket, plenty of patent trenches, and, most cherished of all, a reversible Afghan coat — one side is pink suede, the other’s orange corduroy. It’s the perfect amount of Penny Lane.

Now, I promise this isn’t just a soliloquy of all the coats I’ve loved and longed for, but I need you to know how it came to be that I agreed to not buy “yet another!” coat.

It was around the time my boyfriend discovered I’d been stashing outerwear in the kitchen (very Carrie Bradshaw tbh), and he dealt me an ultimatum: If I’m to bring a new coat into the house, an old one has to go out.

I recoiled in horror at the thought of turning away one of my beloved winter warmers and yet…I find myself considering making the bargain.

You see, Emily Ratajkowski and her fuzzy Mongolian-fur trimmed coat—which goes on sale November 27th—has unlocked something in me. A desire for not just that coat, but all coats. I’m feeling greedy and frivolous. Do I really want to resign myself to this collection forever? I finally understand when engaged people say they had to ask themselves “really, just him/her? Forever?” I’m not sure I’m ready to make that kind of sartorial commitment.

My eye has been turned and I find myself lusting after another love. Here’s a small sampling of the coats that have me considering Vinted’ing my old trusties in favour of newer models...

7 coats I’m currently obsessed with