Sex in lockdown: the women hooking up with their lovers (and the partners who have no idea)

It might be illegal to have sex with someone you don't live with this Valentine's Day, but that hasn't stopped these women breaking the law with their secret lovers

sex in lockdown

It might be illegal to have sex with someone you don't live with this Valentine's Day, but that hasn't stopped these women breaking the law with their secret lovers

We've all made huge sacrifices during lockdown, none more so than waving goodbye to sex in lockdown whenever we fancy it and with whomever we fancy. OK, so Boris eased the libido pressure valve a bit by allowing single person households to 'bubble' up with one other household. Couples who live apart but on their own, may also spend time together and drop the social-distancing rule. But as for the rest of us, this Valentine's Day is set to be a rather staid affair. (Helped only by the lingerie haul we're planning on doing with a huge glass of wine in hand.)

Not withstanding the above exceptions, the bottom line remains - it's illegal to have sex with someone outside of your household. I haven't noticed a nationwide recruitment drive for an all-new 'Passion Police' lately, so it seems highly unlikely your bedroom will be subject to a bonking-busting dawn raid. But FYI - anyone caught breaking the law could face having a criminal record. And no one looks fabulous in a mug shot.

So what does one do about sex in lockdown when, frankly, you've got the horn and don't fancy the partner you actually live with? Looks like some of us are not letting the government's lockdown rules get in the way of their libido. According to a survey conducted by Gleeden, the dating site for discreet encounters, 37 per cent of their UK respondents admit to having illegal sex with their lover during lockdown.

Nonetheless, not all are disobeying government rules, 28 per cent of surveyed members stated being cautious about risks, preferring to maintain contact online until the end of the lockdown. Although with lockdown restrictions easing, a whopping 72 per cent are keen to risk breaking the law by organising sex sessions with their secret lover. We spoke to a few of these women willing to risk it all for sex in lockdown..

'We meet up twice daily to have sex'

'Although I've only been married for eight years, I realised soon after the wedding I'd made a terrible mistake. I was lonely and bored but then the children came to distract me for a while. I was seeing a married man for a couple of months before lockdown started. Initially I was really worried lockdown would tear us apart but it's made us even stronger.

'We kept close by texting and calling whenever possible. Then as soon as restrictions were eased, he immediately offered to drive to the outskirts of my home town and we met for a 'chat and some snacks'. I knew where he was going with that line, that’s why initially I was a bit unsure of meeting during lockdown.

'As I expected it didn't take us long before we grabbed each other and kissed. After that, we've met up twice to have sex. Do I feel guilty? Yes. But I like sex with him too much to stop and go back to my boring normality.' Katy, 33, married with two children

sex in lockdown

'We have sex on video calls'

'I was really upset about not being able to see my lover when lockdown came. The gym closed like everything else and that was my best excuse to meet him after work. We still text each other, and I feel even closer than before. It's not easy with his wife always around but he makes me feel special.

'I miss having sex so much. God! He’s really good at it. The attraction is so strong between us we can’t resist even now. So when we’re both horny we have sex over the phone or on video calls. I started telling my husband to go on long walks with our two kids. Well, guess what? He really enjoys it, so I have a lot of free time to have virtual sex.

'I used to feel guilty, but not anymore. I married when I was too young and innocently in love. I didn’t know what I was doing. In fact, things went really differently from how I wished. Now I'm in a sexless relationship trying to manage work at home, children, my career and a husband who throughout lockdown has been useless. I've found my sparkle again and, most importantly, I feel powerful and visible in the eyes of other men.' Nikky, 29, married with two children

'I only have sex with my lover, never with my husband' 

'To be honest, social distancing did not exist for me. I have not taken the regulations seriously, at least when it comes to meeting up with my lover. I met him on Gleeden a year ago. Me and my husband have a good relationship, but not in romantic way. Not anymore. We stopped having sex after the birth of our child.

'Sex with my new man is great. I don't work from home, so all through lockdown I used the cover of work to get out of the house and see him. When in reality I didn't need to be working so hard. I know what I am doing is not right, but my relationship with this man is way too strong to resist months without seeing each other.' Lexie, 36, married with one child

Maria Coole

Maria Coole is a contributing editor on Marie Claire.

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