We can't decide
When it comes to dating trends, we like to think we’re pretty clued up. Whether it’s the Game of Thrones-inspired white walking dating trend, or the rather rude and cheap sneating, long gone are the days of the original ghosting. Ah, the simple days when you’d just be suddenly ignored rather than cushioned or stashed!
So not all dating trends are created equal. Most of them tend to fall on the crappy behaviour spectrum, but there are a few that can actually be seen as positive. For example, Grande-ing, which is ‘practicing gratefulness at the end of a relationship and rejecting negativity and bitterness as you move forward with your life.’
However, the latest dating trend has left many people torn because it’s hard to work out whether it’s harsh or fair.
Enter Kondo-ing. As you have probably guessed, it is a term inspired by tidying sensation, Marie Kondo. If you’ve seen her Netflix series, you’ll know that she encourages people to get rid of anything that doesn’t ‘spark joy’. But far from just using this logic to decide whether you really need seven Breton tops in your wardrobe, it can be applied to your love life, too.
Time wasters, cheats, gaslighters, the ones who tell you after six months of dating that they’re not ready for a relationship – Plenty of Fish coined the term Kondo-ing to explain getting rid of anyone who doesn’t ‘spark joy’.
Completely cutting out someone who is treating you badly is a good idea, but what if the person you’re seeing is just not right for you? What if they’re lovely but you just don’t have that spark? What if they’re a good egg that you’d totally want to stay friends with? Do they deserve being Kondo-ed? Probably not.
With that in mind, maybe just be mindful of who really deserves to be Kondo-ed.