Champagne on tap, drag queens, Michelin star menus and a tattoo parlour - how Virgin Voyages is making cruises cool again

Hands up if you’ve never considered going on a cruise before because you imagined it would mean a week of fighting for the last barbecue skewer at the buffet, enduring cheesy entertainment night after night and practicing untold amounts of patience when you get splashed by kids dive bombing in the pool?

Okay. Now imagine that every restaurant on board has an à la carte menu, there’s not a tribute act in sight, there’s a tattoo parlour if you fancy an inking and champagne on tap whenever you need it. Oh, and it’s adults only.

Suddenly sounding a bit more appealing? The Virgin Voyages luxury liners are here to crush every preconceived idea you have about cruises, re-branding the sun soaked sails to make them cool again. And honestly, Richard Branson, it’s working. 

The Valiant Lady has a pretty spectacular way of doing things. Travelling from Barcelona to Ibiza by way of incredible mediterranean hotspots like Ajaccio and Cagliari, the ship’s Irresistible Med route showcases some gorgeous European gems. So if you want to enjoy the delights of Italy and France before the ship heads to Miami later this year, now’s your chance. 

The ship 

The Valiant Lady is the second ship in the Virgin Voyages fleet, following on from their debut offering, The Scarlet Lady. 

Valiant is pretty unmissable at the port, standing at a whopping 278 metres long with capacity to hold over 2,700 sailors. However, with seventeen decks packed full of places to eat, drink, dance, swim, sunbathe, work out and - most importantly - chill out, you’ll never feel crowded. 

Naturally, Virgin’s musical roots are very much a part of the trip with the likes of Bloc Party and The XX playing throughout the ship during the day, and the whole vessel is an Instagrammer’s playground. If you’re ever lost for things to do (you won’t be), just head to the aquarium themed lifts for a selfie session. Seriously, they never get old.

Oh, and here’s a little tip: if you’re interested in using a loo with a view, head to the pool deck and turn right at the bar - it’s interesting.

The rooms

The Sea Terrace rooms are light, airy and modern with a seafaring twist and the option for a double or twin set up - both of which can be transformed into sofa seating during the day to maximise space. You’ll have the many modcons that you’d also find in a hotel - rainshower, flat screen TV, wifi, AC - and as you’re on a luxury cruise liner, you’ll also have a private balcony with your very own hammock, perfect for that pre-dinner chill out on a balmy evening. 

The lighting, heating and curtains can all be controlled with an in-room tablet, and there are a number of fun mood settings to play with. It’s also where you’ll find a range of films to stream for those wind-down hours. 

If you want to treat yourself, there are premium cabin options available in the Rockstar Quarters and these also give you access to Richard’s Rooftop, an exclusive deck for VIPs. Fancy.

The food

With over twenty eateries to whet your appetite and menus curated by Michelin star chefs no less, the food on the Valiant Lady will definitely impress (and keep you full). 

Brunch lovers should head straight to Razzle Dazzle. Not only will you get your grid-worthy shot thanks to its bold monochrome-meets-unicorn decor, you’ll find everything your avocado toast, poached eggs, fairy bread-loving heart desires. 

For dinner, Gunbae is home to mouth-watering Korean BBQ plates and the tables are equipped with grills so you can cook your own dishes. Pink Agave is where you’ll find a range of ‘elevated’ Mexican dishes - from squash with habanero pepper to seared shrimp and roasted duck - and you’ll want to try everything. Best to make two reservations. 

But for a true treat of the tastebuds, make a beeline for The Wake. Situated at the back of the ship, the steak and seafood restaurant offers incredible ocean views through the floor to ceiling windows at the stern and it all feels very grand. Think Mad Men meets Titanic vibes. Start with oysters, then try the fillet mignon or New Zealand lamb chops with a side of creamed spinach and brown butter wild mushrooms. Washed down with a glass of Champagne, obviously.

And what’s on offer during the day? Well, for starters there’s an ice cream parlour open from 11.30am to 10pm (no one will judge you on how many times you visit in a day), but if you’re looking for a savoury lunch there’s a cute pizzeria offering made-to-order pizza. The Galley is your go-to for a quick lunch, and it’s also open throughout the night - meaning that the 3am post-club hunger pangs (yes, there’s a nightclub on board - more on that later) will be satisfied with a full English should you want one. 

For those who love a little room service, fear not. You haven’t been forgotten. The Virgin Voyages app makes it super easy to order food to your room - think the ship’s very own version of Uber Eats. Handy? Yes. Dangerous? Also yes.

The drinks

With chic bars aplenty, you’ll be spoilt for choice when it comes to after dinner drinks. Grab a cocktail at On The Rocks while listening to some soothing live jazz, or knock back the bubbles at the Champagne bar, Sip Lounge. For more of a pub feel, try Draught Haus or The Loose Cannon.

And if you’re after a dance floor, The Manor is a two-storey nightclub opposite the casino with a sparkly mirrored entrance (aka perfect for photo opps).

The facilities

Whether your ideal getaway is spent lounging in the sun, propped up at the bar, unwinding with a massage or hitting the gym, the Valiant Lady has got you covered. 

The pool deck boasts two options for those wanting a dip, and there are absolutely enough outdoor seating, sprawling and laying spaces for everyone - whether you want a double sun bed, individual lounger, deck chair or private cabana. 

Unwinding in the spa is a must, so book yourself in for a seaweed wrap or hot stone therapy and hit up the Thermal Suite for a sauna and steam, plunge pools, and mud and salt rooms.

Anyone who wants to get a little movement in can make the most of the outdoor space incorporating everything from a running track, outdoor gym, basketball court and boxing ring, or head to the indoor gym to get your sweat on. Fitness classes are also available, from yoga to an 80s VHS style workout. Don’t say exercise on the Valiant Lady isn’t fun. 

There’s also a tattoo parlour if you’re feeling daring, and a number of shops for a little retail therapy.

What to do 

Considering the ship is 18+, you can expect the nightly entertainment to be less pop star impersonators or kid friendly magic shows. Instead think hilarious drag queens, artists from the New York theatre scene and risqué sex shows. 

There are also fun activities which you can book through the app, including sip and paint classes, as well as pub quizzes and a Scarlet Night - when everyone is encouraged to wear red, head to the pool deck and dance the night away under the stars.

Off ship, there are so many excursions to choose from that you’ll need to spend some time seriously selecting your favourites. Enjoy an al fresco lunch with farm to table ingredients in the Italian countryside, take a cooking class in Corsica or book a high adrenaline sport at one of your stop offs. Whatever you decide to do, make sure you save yourself for the penultimate night when the ship docks in Ibiza and you’re free to go and party on the Island until dawn. 

Route

The Valiant Lady’s Irresistible Med route starts in Barcelona before heading to Toulon, Marina di Carrara, Ajaccio, Cagliari and Ibiza, then returning to Barcelona. 

Virgin Voyages offer a number of routes for travellers, whether you prefer to sail through Europe or coast the Caribbean, and you can find out more about the trips on offer here. 

Need to knows

App-y Days

Everything you need is accessible via the Virgin Voyages app - whether you want to book an excursion, check out the gym class timetable or make a dinner reservation. And if you want someone to come and find you with champagne, that’s also an option. Seriously. 

Brace-let yourself

Upon checking in, you’ll receive a band which will act as both your room key and your wallet. You can load your money onto the bracelet using the app, meaning that you never have to worry about carrying cash or a key. Easy. 

No need to wine

While many cruise lines prohibit passengers from bringing alcohol onto the ship, Virgin Voyages allows sailors to bring two bottles of wine (750ml) in their hand luggage. You can also purchase goods at stop-off ports, meaning that if you want to bring that delicious bottle of Rioja home you very much can. Hurrah. While you can’t consume alcohol purchased elsewhere during your journey, staff will store it for you to collect when you disembark. 

It is also worth noting that service tips are included in the price of your fare. Food and essential drinks are covered for the duration of your voyage.

Eco Trip

To lean into more sustainable practices, there are a number of initiatives on board including the banning of single-use plastics, water bottles, packaging and non-recyclable takeaway cups. They also purify waste water, the room sensors ensure less energy is used and they transform heat from the engines into clean energy. On top of that, Virgin Voyages partners with not-for-profit organisations to advance ocean education and protection.

How to book

The Valiant Lady is currently sailing in Europe, but there are a number of routes you may be interested in. For more information and to book your trip, visit www.virginvoyages.com.