Ever wondered: what is a soulmate, and do they actually exist?

An expert explains.

(Image credit: Getty Images)

An expert explains.

Ever wondered - what actually is a soulmate? Do they really exist? And how do you attract yours, if you're ready for a relationship but keep finding yourself dating the wrong people?

All good questions, and not one that it's necessarily easy to answer, either. That's why we've picked the brains of mindset coach of over fifteen years Natasha Graziano, who's recently gone viral for her Meditational Behavioural Synchronicity (MBS) method, which promises to help people attract their soulmate - without ever meeting them - by following five simple steps.

Sound a little - well, out there? It is, but she's literally living proof that it can work. She met her husband virtually on Clubhouse last year and married him on the app a couple of months later.

Plus, it's grounded in the same neuroscience behind the Law Of Attraction, she shares. Here, she explains what a soulmate is, whether they exist, and how to find yours, using her unique approach.

Keep scrolling - and don't miss our guides to what to talk about on a first date, how to cope with being cheated on and common sexual fantasies, while you're here.

What is a soulmate? Your guide

According to the coach, a soulmate is someone to who your heart is deeply connected in a multitude of ways: physically, emotionally, and spiritually. "It's also someone who you have a powerful, deep, true connection with that can not be broken," she goes on.

"A soulmate is the person that inspires you to be your best self, that person that understands you better than anybody else, that soul that you can share anything and everything with," she continues.

So how do you know if you've met your soulmate? A question people have long wanted to know the answer to. "Once you meet that person, the desire to stay by their side and never leave them is profound."

"I had never felt that divine bond before - I had never had such a powerful, honest, profound connection with any partner."

"I immediately knew I had met my soulmate when I encountered my husband, Michael, because the strong feeling of connection was something so much bigger than myself," she explains.

What is a soulmate? Smiling Woman With Boyfriend Watching TV At Home

How do you attract a soulmate?

Obviously, there are hundreds of coaches claiming they've found *the* method for attracting a soulmate, but Graziano's MBS method has been gaining traction over the past few months for a reason.

One thing she flags that you should think of prior to starting your search: ask yourself how similar are you to that ideal person that you wish to attract. "In life, you attract everything you are - not what you want or need," she shares.

Similarly, if you don't love yourself, you won't have the capacity to fully love someone else. "Work on yourself first. If you do have things to work on, be patient with yourself and chip away at it until you become it," she recommends.

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MBS method: how does it work?

According to the coach, it's a world-renowned method that combines ancient breathing techniques with modern-day neuroscience, accessing deeper, altered states of awareness (alpha and theta states of your brain) through guided meditation.

"It has been referred to as three years of therapy in 15 minutes because with just one session I’ve seen people experience deep, prolific positive changes in their lives," she shares.

Graziana maintains that it allows you to:

  • Access deeper parts of yourself
  • Heal past traumas
  • Remove blockages
  • Shift limiting beliefs in order to achieve your goals and create a life beyond your wildest dreams.

It's also been compared to NLP (neuro-linguistic programming), self-hypnosis, and other globally commonly practiced meditation techniques," she continues.

More than 1.5 million people have been positively impacted by the MBS method, and around 100 million people have been exposed to an MBS meditation to this day. The MBS method is the bridge between the life you are living now and the life you want to live. It is the fastest route to create long-lasting positive changes in your life.

What is a soulmate? Portrait of young couple playing on bed indoors at home, laughing.

5 steps to attracting a soulmate

Do note here: Graziano's five steps won't be for everyone. Attracting a soulmate differs from person to person, and various techniques - along with good old fate - will work. But for some, drilling down into who you are and what you want from a relationship - as well as making sure you're happy with yourself before launching into one - could be the key to lifelong happiness.

"The five steps to attracting a soulmate are no different than the five pillars to achieving your goals", maintains the pro. Ready to give them a go? Wellness planner at the ready...

1. Have clarity in your vision

That is, try and understand who you want to attract into your life in every aspect. Think:

  • Their personality traits
  • Likes
  • Dislikes
  • Habits
  • Career
  • Strengths
  • Weaknesses
  • How they make you feel, etc.

"Most people have absolutely no idea what they want," shares the coach. She reckons that clarity allows you to be in alignment with your thoughts, feelings, and actions, and makes attracting your soulmate much easier.

2. Remove blockages

FYI, we all hold limiting beliefs inside of us that keep us from achieving and attracting what we want.

"In love, the limiting belief that is keeping you from attracting your soulmate will most likely sound something along the lines of “I am not worthy of love” or “ I am not worthy of being loved"", she explains. Removing these blockages within you opens space for better things to come.

3. Replace old limiting beliefs 

With new, loving, empowering, positive beliefs. Sound good? Yeah, we thought so too.

"By replacing the negative beliefs you have ingrained in your subconscious mind, your life will begin to change dramatically and you will be able to attract your soulmate and anything else you want," warns the coach.

What is a soulmate? Two women in a relationship

4. Expand your vision

Not sure what this means? In order to expand your vision, you must first understand who your expanders are, shares Graziano. "Your expanders are the people who are closest to you. You are a direct reflection of these people, so for this step, make sure you surround yourself with people that will fill you with the love you are seeking," she advises.

In other words, uplift you and encourage you to be your best self.

Once you've done that, she advises checking your surroundings. "Does your home, who you follow on social media, and your habits fit the life you are trying to create?," she asks.

5. Take an aligned action

The last step to meeting your soulmate? Physically getting out there, she encourages.

"Get out of your comfort zone, work to feel your best, and every day, set yourself up for success," she encouragaes.

Any tips for someone who may be sceptical about employing the steps?

First things first: it's normal to be sceptical.

Graziano was herself when she first tried the method, she shares - "I was fearful to try something new as so many things didn't work for me before," she explains. "Then I realized that if you always do what you always did, you’ll always get what you always got."

"If you want to see a change in your life then you have to change yourself first," she continues.

Things like trying to think more positively - ("your thoughts become your reality") and practicing a routine daily ("your daily habits become you") are great places to start, she shares. "Results are based on your actions, so take new actions if you want to see a new result."

What do you reckon?

Ally Head
Senior Health, Sustainability and Relationships Editor

Ally Head is Marie Claire UK's Senior Health, Sustainability, and Relationships Editor, nine-time marathoner, and Boston Qualifying runner. Day-to-day, she works across site strategy, features, and e-commerce, reporting on the latest health updates, writing the must-read health and wellness content, and rounding up the genuinely sustainable and squat-proof gym leggings worth *adding to basket*. She's won a BSME for her sustainability work, regularly hosts panels and presents for events like the Sustainability Awards, and saw nine million total impressions on the January 2023 Wellness Issue she oversaw. Follow Ally on Instagram for more or get in touch.