Woo.
Dating in 2018 can be a bit tricky. Whether you're looking for true love or someone to watch The Princess Switch with, do you Tinder? Bumble? Hinge? Try your luck at meeting people IRL? (Lol, no.)
But once you've met your match, shared a few dough balls at Pizza Express and confessed that your hobbies include watching Love Island re-runs, things get a bit more difficult. Why? Because you're up against a hundred and one 'dating trends' - whether you're a victim or a perpetrator.
It gets far more complicated than a bit of ghosting. Ah, the easy days when you were simply dumped without being told! A time when you question whether leaving 18 voicemails frantically asking where they've gone is a tad excessive (girlfriends say yes, brain says no).
Nowadays there's zombieing (when the ghost in question reappears), there's cushioning (when your new partner lines up another lover to soften the blow when they break up with you), and then there's stashing (when your OH hides you from everyone in their life like a pair of dirty socks).
And it's not just navigating your way through modern dating with a potential partner - you can be orbited by your ex, so even those ghost loves of the past aren't leaving you to it.
Luckily, there's ANOTHER ONE! And it's called 'Gatsbying'.
Coined by Matilda Dods in a piece on TomBoyBeauty.com, and it involves social media.
You know when you're trying to get someone's attention by living your best (ahem, carefully constructed) life on Instagram stories? Dancing at a swanky bar, filling up on porn star martinis, generally being all of the fun?
But you'll probably miss out the bit where you fell asleep with kebab meat on your face.
That's 'Gatsbying'. Not the kebab bit. But the part where you show off on social media to get someone's attention.
Matilda writes: 'Why, instead of just sending a text to the boy that I like, am I throwing the equivalent of a champagne soaked, chandelier swinging, Charleston dancing party on my Instagram story? All for that ceaseless green light across the water that is the attention of a boy who, let’s be real, probably isn’t good enough for me anyway?'
Guilty? Same.
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