'Authentic Christian and Ana fun'
Mr Grey probably won’t see you now, but you can still channel the spirit of Fifty Shades of Grey with one of the wildest advent calendars we’ve seen around. If you’ve ever wanted to live out your own IRL Fifty Shades fantasy, Lovehoney will give you 24 reasons to with their massive advent calendar which is packed with products from their E.L. James inspired line.
According to the site, it’s packed with ‘24 top-quality toys and bondage items that will set your sex life on fire.’ (Big words, Lovehoney.) The entire collection has toys that you can either use solo or with your partner for some ‘authentic Christian and Ana fun’, including a vibrating cock ring, silicone jiggle balls and a Greedy Girl rabbit vibrator for gals out here doing it for themselves.
The collection is priced at £200, but Lovehoney’s currently doing a pretty insane Christmas sale so you can snag it now for £80 – 60% off the original retail price. To put things into perspective, their Greedy Girl rabbit vibrator is usually priced at £69.99 alone so you’ll basically get 23 other treats for an extra £10 more. That’s a bargain if we’ve ever seen one.
This alternative advent calendar was specifically designed for couples according to the site and if you’re interested in what goes into Red Room arsenal, they’ve got you covered. On the bondage side, it includes handcuffs, ankle cuffs, a hogtie, bondage rope, bondage tape, spanking paddle, flogger and a feather tickler. On top of that, it’s vibrator galore as they’ll throw in the aforementioned Greedy Girl vibrator, vibrating nipple clamps, silicone jiggle balls, a finger vibrator, vibrating cock ring, nipple suckers, metal nipple clamps, a metal clit clamp and a silicone prostate massager. TBH, we’re sweating in the office thinking about it all: whether that’s in excitement or pure anxiety is anybody’s guess. We mean, just look at this beast:
Priced at £80, available at Lovehoney.co.uk
Given that we’re six days in and it’ll take a day or two for this monster to get to your front door, you’ll have a lot of catching up to do. (You might want to block out the weekend, just saying.) The best part about it all? It comes with all the batteries you’ll ever need, so you won’t have to faff around ripping them out of the telly remote.
Just a quick note though: Christian Grey doesn’t come included