A hangover-free alcohol has been invented (yes, really)

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  • But we’re not going to get to sample it any time soon…

    Just imagine – a drink which looks like alcohol, tastes like alcohol and gets you drunk like alcohol, but doesn’t give you a hangover (like alcohol).

    Sound too good to be true? It’s not.

    Thanks Professor David Nutt, our new favourite scientist, there’s now a synthetic alternative to alcohol which delivers all the positive effects of real alcohol (you know, losing your inhibitions, boosting your confidence etc) without all the usual morning-after misery. Just think, no more dry mouth! No more head-splitting headaches! No more clinging to the loo for dear life! The possibilities are endless.

    By researching substances which have a similar effect on the brain as alcohol, Professor Nutt’s team came up with the drink known as ‘alcosynth’, which he told The Independent goes ‘very nicely into mojitos’.

    Alcosynth is also perfect if you sometimes struggle to know your limits, as its easily controlled potency means that you only ever get mildly tipsy rather than drunk. Even better, its effects only last a couple of hours so no more mid-week boozing guilt. Win-win.

    While it might sound like a lot of research just to be able to get pissed without feeling horrible about it the next day, there’s actually a good reason for the research. Providing people with an alternative to alcohol like alcosynth removes the risk of liver damage, saving thousands of lives. And with alcohol now estimated to cost the NHS £3.5bn per year, it could also save a hell of a lot of money too.

    The bad news is though that the product has so far been blocked apparently by EU and government regulations, meaning that we aren’t going to get our hands on it any time soon. In fact, the cost of funding further research and concerns about regulations mean that alcosynth probably won’t be available until 2050. Oh, and it doesn’t do anything to prevent drunken texting or embarrassing behaviour either…

    And just like that, all our dreams shatter.

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