Suddenly all those post-it notes about who drank the milk don't seem quite so bad after all...
Whether your days of flat sharing with strangers are long gone, or if you’re currently in the midst of a war over who last bought the toilet roll and whether or not your housemate has thrown away your toothpaste, a series of roommate emails in the US are about to make you feel a lot better about your current living arrangements.
New student Winnie was preparing to move into a dorm room at college, when she was introduced to her two new roomies over email.
But instead of discussing who would bring the kettle and when everybody planned to arrive on the first day, Winnie quickly found herself on the receiving end of a mind-boggling array of commands – detailing exactly where Roommate X (for Xtremely Insane) needed to sleep and what furniture she would be insisting upon claiming for her own.
‘Okay so I’m not sure why neither of you responded back to my emails, but I don’t really care just as long as you both know this and understand that I’m not gonna settle for anything less than what I’m gonna tell you that I’m gonna get once I arrive in the dorm,’ begins the email – setting the tone for things to come.
‘I’ll take the top bunk of the bunk bed that has a bottom and top bunk. I DO NOT want the single bunk where it has a desk underneath the top bunk so don’t try to leave me with that.
‘I’m also taking one of the white closets. There should be two white closets and I’m taking one of them. I don’t care for which one it is, just know I’m taking one of them.
‘I want the desk that’s near the window. Plain and simple. I don’t care about who gets the bottom bunk but just know what I stated above is what I’m expecting once I arrive at the dorm and I won’t be in the mood for any arguing or other nonsense because one of you two decided to deliberately disregard this email. If needed be I’ll turn it into a bigger situation so don’t try me.
‘Sorry but not that sorry for the attitude. I don’t like being ignored because that’s just rude but that’s what you both decided to do so I decided to make it clear now on the kind of person I am and what I will and will not take.
‘So as a final reminder: I am getting the top bunk of the bunk bed with the bed on the bottom. I am getting one of the white closest, and I’m getting the desk near the window. that’s fair enough to ask for considering that I’m giving up fighting for the bottom bunk.’
After Winnie posted the email online (where it was promptly shared over 4,800 times), their other roommate, Guistinna, took the time to respond to the girl who will soon be sharing a small room with for them both next ten months: