How to: Rediscover the art of seduction

Promotional feature with BOSS The Scent

From signature scents to striking up a conversation, Amie-Jo Locke looks at how to reconnect with your partner on a much deeper level

If you’re anything like me, the word ‘seduction’ can often seem like an unattainable premise. Why? Because to the best of my knowledge, I’ve never seduced anything or anyone.

Not on purpose anyways.

Seduction for me is something best left to the sassy, corseted ladies of yore, hell bent on securing themselves a foppish nobleperson to help keep them in ribbons and silk stockings. And you know, right on sisters. These girls knew how to entice, beguile and entrance potential partners – a skill I feel sadly, I do not possess.

So in the run up to Valentine’s Day, a holiday that encourages us to examine our relationships on a much deeper level, I wanted to discover what seduction means for the modern woman. Women, like me, who are probably right now looking over at their long term partner and thinking, ‘did we seduce each other, and wait, how did that happen again?’

The answer I’ve discovered, lies in the simplicity of the spoken word.

Think about it. Did you meet at a concert where you happened to bond over a favourite band? Was your first date spent savouring a shared love of Italian food? All of these memories are based on sensory experiences, that can be revisited by simply talking about them and maybe heightening them further. In an age where we spend more time scrolling rather than speaking (guilty), isn’t it time we ditch the swipe and struck up a conversation instead?

In fact, the art of vocal exchange can be an incredibly powerful tool in the art of seduction. Take humour for example. Whether you’re quoting Partridge or sharing cat memes, laughing with your partner is so important. In a 2016 study conducted by Kansas University, it was found that relationship satisfaction is down to the humour couples create together* – the emphasis being on the word ‘create’. Humour that is shared through conversational banter. Interestingly, it’s those quirky jokes and isms that help to affirm our bond – which in itself is a powerful form of seduction.

Ask yourself, when was the last time you and your ride or die spent the whole night conversing with each other without checking what your pals were up to on Insta? According to the dictionary, the word ‘seduce’ means to ‘attract powerfully’ – so ask them, what it was that first attracted them to you. Was it your smile? Your cool trainers? Your scent? Small revelations such as these are indescribably seductive.

In fact, recent studies suggest that our own natural odour and signature fragrance is key when attracting a mate. A staggering 75% of our emotions are triggered by what we smell** – making it arguably the most powerful of the senses. Look for scents that invigorate and arouse, such as BOSS The Scent. Peach, fresh orange blossom and delicate freesia join tones of irresistible dark cocoa for a finish that’s guaranteed to elevate the exchange.

And be sure to ask them questions too. What’s your favourite old movie? Will we see if it’s playing in an old theatre somewhere? Rediscovering that spark is as simple as rediscovering what connected you in the first place, and these conversations will help establish a longer and more meaningful connection.

By opening this exchange without distraction (yes, put those phones away), you’ll soon realise what it is about each other that first drew you together – to ‘powerfully attract’ that special person by meetings as equals. And just like that, you’ve mastered the art of seduction. No corset required.

* Source: Personal Relationships Journal, 2017

**Source: The Scent-It Palette, August 2014