18 Things You’ll Only Know If You’re Ginger

From the ‘hilaire’ ginger jokes you’ve been subjected to since school, to the fact you could lie in the sun for the entire day and never, EVER tan, its not always easy being a ginger…


1. You’ve spent years trying to find a shade of foundation pale enough to match your skin tone, but although you’ve purchased ‘Ivory’ in every single make-up brand that ever existed it’s still not pale enough. Gah!

2. If you happen to be in the same group as a fellow red-head everyone assumes you must be related.

3. You have a sense of solidarity with fellow ginges and are tempted to give them a high five as you walk past.

4. On the flipside, you’re also a teensy bit protective about your status as the only ginge in the village and should another red-head dare venture into your territory you’re tempted to shoot them a ‘one of us is going to have to leave’ look.

5. If you had a pound for every time you’ve heard the phrase ‘people pay a fortune to get your hair colour’ you’d be able to retire at 30.

6. See also people asking if your hair is ‘natural.’

7. When ‘pale and interesting’ was declared a thang you rejoiced for a month. Finally you’re on-trend.

8. On a night out you often get mistaken for Nicola from Girls Aloud, despite the fact you look absolutely nothing like her. Because obviously everyone with red hair looks EXACTLY THE SAME. Seen one ginger seen them all.

9. Walking down the street minding your own business? Watch out for the clever clogs (usually but not always driving a white van) who can’t resist yelling ‘Rickaaaaaayyyy’ a la Bianca from Eastenders. Original!

10. If you’re the only one in your family with red hair be prepared for the hilarious ‘bet the milkman was ginger’ quips. They never get old, and/or ridiculous – who even has a milkman these days?

11. At some point you will have been asked if the collars match the cuffs. Rude!

12. In the summer you’re afraid to venture outside without slathering on the Factor 50+. You get fried walking to prêt and back for a BLT for heaven’s sake.

13. Fake tan before a holiday is a must. Consequently you’re the only one who comes back from two weeks in Spain paler than they arrived.

14. When you see a Hollywood role go to a faux-ginge you can’t help feeling slightly peeved. ‘You couldn’t find a ‘real’ ginger?’

15. You could be the calmest, most chilled person in the world but people always assume ginger = fiery. But maybe if people didn’t keep joking about your short fuse you wouldn’t be so goddam fiery!

16. Yellow/mustard/lemon clothes are out. Ditto: red or orange, on account that it clashes with your hair. Oh and anything pale, pinks, blues, nudes. Sounds cute, looks awful!

17. At some point you will have been called one of the following; milk bottle, Casper, as in the friendly ghost (because you’re so white), Strawberry Shortcake, Freckle Face, Ginger Minger (that one rhymes and everything!), Carrot top, Rusty, Spuggy (remember her from Byker Grove?)

18. You secretly fancy Ron Weasley, mainly because then you’d be guaranteed to have a mini-me, red-headed bubba.

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