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It’s true: all the best men are taken

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Single women are much keener on pursuing a man who’s already taken, than one who is single, a new study says.

‘The single women really, really liked the guy when he was taken,’ says Melissa Burkley of Oklahoma State University in Stillwater, who conducted the ‘mate-poaching’ study with her colleague Jessica Parker.

They asked 184 heterosexual students at the university to participate in a study on sexual attraction and told the volunteers that a computer program would match them with an ideal partner.

The most striking result was in the responses of single women. Offered a single man, 59% were interested in pursuing a relationship. But when he was attached, 90% said they were up for the chase.

Burkley and Parker speculate that single women may be more drawn to attached men because they've already been ‘pre-screened’ by other women and found to be satisfactory as a mate, whereas single men are more of an unknown quantity.

Burkely said that similar mate-poaching strategies have been reported in birds and fish.

‘The next question is why,’ says Burkley. So in further studies, she plans to further explore women's motives for pursuing taken partners. Apart from the explanation of ‘pre-screening’, another possibility, she says, is that in US society, women are socialised to be competitive, so they derive self-esteem by mate-poaching from rival women.

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Wednesday 19 August 2009


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Another pointless correlation study from the lab of the 'better to be researching something than nothing scientist'.
This has nothing to do with being 'socialised to be competitive' or a way to make ourselves feel better by stealing another womans man as the report suggests.
I'm shocked that any reputable scientific journal would publish this.
The answer really is as simple as this: The best men are already taken.
Comment by Genevieve on August 19 13:22

No you're wrong Genevieve - I have commented many times on this - my best mate floozy went after my husband of 32 years (she was married for 23)because he represented something of an enigma, he came from the south, she always lived in Yorkshire, so when the opportunity arose she simply kept on persuing and digging her heels in till she got him!!!! It was a case of him being a better provider and conversationalist than her dull husband, and my husband and I were at a crossroad, not getting on well, he wasn't working at the time, and instead of buckling down and looking for a job (he took early retirement)he simply started messing about with her - she didn't work - whilst I did all the work!!!Men like that think they have found something exciting, greener grass, etc - but she was in shock when she found out what she really got - a man who was not healthy - he has a colostomy - and he likewise, she has a history of slipped discs and backache, whilst he never ever contended with me ever being ill!!!! They're still together but struggling with a mortgage, bills, never doing a day's work the both of them, well, need I say more - her going after a ready-made man turned out to be a mistake after all.
Comment by Cate on August 21 15:35

I am not sure if I would persue a man who is Married or had a partner!
Yes I admit it is a very attractive quality when you see a good looking daddy with his kiddies at the weekend,( they have got better looking,& found a sence of dress) but go and interfer in all that "NO way"!
As I wouldn't want another women to do the same to me!!
I like the idea of a hassle free life, in every aspect & believe their are still a lot of good, single unattached men out there...

Women who persue these kinds of men often have the illusion he will be a good provider, he may be, but they also forget he will still have to provide for his "First family" not forgetting a connection with the previous...
Be warned if he can do it once he can do it to YOU too...
Comment by Sandra on August 24 14:03

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