Nicole Scherzinger may be one of the pop world’s most stunning stars, but she revealed she hasn’t always seen the beauty, which is evident to everyone else, in herself. The X Factor judge has admitted she suffered with bulimia during her time with former band Pussycat Dolls and began to be ‘disgusted’ with herself.
In a refreshingly honest interview for VH1’s Behind The Music series Nicole opened up about the terrible time she went through. Speaking about the eating disorder, with tears in her eyes she said: ‘I just hated myself. I really was so disgusted with myself and so embarrassed. I felt so alone. I was in a group, and I never felt so alone in my life.'
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After bravely admitting she’d battled with bulimia she added: 'Every time I had a second to be alone, I was doing something to myself. You get, like, blisters on your hands or scars on your hands, and I’d try to hide those. I think the girls could tell.’
Explaining why she’s never spoken about the dark time in her past, Nicole explained it was to protect her family.
She said: ‘It’s embarrassing. I never spoke about it. Like I said, I never want to play a victim, and I never wanted my family to hear about things from me because I think it would break their heart.’
While she recently said things with boyfriend Lewis Hamilton are ‘lovely’, in this interview she spoke about the times when loneliness crept into her life, especially after big performances.
‘When I got off stage, I was on this high, and I’d come back to my room and I’d be alone,’ she said. ‘So I would just do things. My bulimia was my addiction; hurting myself was my addiction.'
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However, things turned around when she stepped out as a solo artist in 2010 carving out an impressive career. It was music that Nicole said ‘saved’ her as she added: ‘'The music is what saved me, it's the only thing that I can trust.'
Bravo Nicole for speaking out about such an emotive subject.
What do you think? Do you admire Nicole Scherzinger’s honesty about her battle with bulimia? Let us know below.