As illegal drugs go mainstream, ‘high sex’ is increasingly becoming the credible alternative to the (often disappointing) drunken shag, as Max Daly reveals...
It’s official: sex on drugs is a thing. Rihanna has a copy of the cannabis lover’s guidebook, Sex Pot The Marijuana Lover’s Guide to Gettin’ It On by Mamakind. There’s a range of clothing emblazoned Highsex, a dating app for weed smokers called High There! and let’s not forget the marijuana-infused lube and a dildo that doubles as a bong. Meanwhile, social media is full of drug-sex references, such as #highgasm and #stonersex.
‘Sex on MDMA is intense and beautiful,’ says Kirsty, a 33-year-old teacher from Manchester. ‘Small doses of ecstasy make my head tingle and my skin feel sensitive. It’s a more sensuous experience than non-drug sex.’
A club-goer who fits her nights out around a hectic work schedule, Kirsty says having sex on ecstasy (described by Sheila Henderson in her book Ecstasy The Case Unsolved, as ‘a feminist’s dream’) is all about being on the same wavelength. ‘On ecstasy, boys are less bothered about their goal and more concerned with you. It’s easier to express yourself because it makes you feel more intimate. It doesn’t work if I’m on ecstasy and he’s drunk,’ says Kirsty.
Taking different drugs has varying sexual effects. Generally speaking, stimulants such as speed and cocaine make sex last longer. Ecstasy, with its powers that increase empathy and euphoria, is more about sensuality, while cannabis can increase awareness of touch and taste. GHB, GBL and crystal meth – drugs used at gay ‘chemsex’ parties – produce the best orgasms. And while for men, drugs enhance the experience below the waist, for women, the impact seems to be more cognitive.
However, a study looking into how different drugs are used for sex that was carried out by John Moores University involving 1,300 clubbers in nine European cities found that the more drugs people took, the more sexual partners they were likely to have. And the less likely they were to use contraception.
‘I’ve got a high sex drive and I can’t remember the last time I had sex without cocaine,’ says Charlotte, a 28-year-old legal secretary from Kent. ‘If a man has taken coke, it goes on all night and the burning desire is satisfied.’
But of course there is a downside, too, with any chance of lasting intimacy out of the question. ‘The next day I want him out of my bed as I get very down,’ adds Charlotte. ‘My behaviour on drugs is very different from the person I present at work or to my family.’