Chocolate!

Posted by Lara Masters at 17:59 on 16 Jun 2010

• Print
• Share
• Comment

I know I promised to be a blog maniac after being ordered to renounce sugar for reasons of migraines and surmising I would have more time to focus on non-confectionary related matters in true proverbial door-shutting/window-opening manner. However, in typical life-happening-while-you-make-other-plans stylee, I find myself not only continuing to blog infrequently but also to be quite fixated on what is now forbidden fruit - i.e all things chocolate.

I can't say I'm surprised by this newly sprouted tendril of OCD. When the naturopath told me to give up sugar, I knew it was going to provoke my innate inclination to kick against restriction. And because I can't kick, I nodded obediently then went home and ate nothing but Easter eggs for three days. I also asked if I had to give up alcohol but the naturopath said "absolutely not; drink as much as you like" so of course I haven't touched a drop since my consultation.

However, in be-careful-what-you-wish-for type manner, I threw caution to the wind and just bally well wished to be able to eat chocolate again - and - lo and behold, the universe has bestowed upon me a way  to eat chocolate, even in the face of it being strictly prohibited, in a most uncanny fashion...

I got invited to lunch at a place called Whole Foods Market which sounded way too muesli and live yoghurt to be any fun and I was quite lukewarm about the girl who invited me too, so nearly didn't go (Hi Emma).

Anyway, I did go and was transported into a food intolerances' Utopia; suddenly, simply not being allowed sugar seemed  very amateur and pedestrian. Emma, who now seemed way more Hollywood being vegan, lactose-intolerance and Kosher, thrust some naturally sweetened, Booja Booja dark chocolate raspberry truffles and chocolate ice-cream in my face. These treats were so over-whelmingly delicious, I became irritated that I hadn't been warned off sugar long ago. Honestly, what was my naturopath thinking only bringing it up now? Well, I certainly intend to make up for his oversight.

Plus it's perfectly O.K that I thought Emma was a cold fish before because over our Quinoa Cranberry Sweet Potato Cakes (lactose/gluten free and vegan), she told me most people don't like her at first. I acted vaguely surprised but we both knew by "most people" she meant me (and most people) but now we hook-up and share intimacies regularly as if I never didn't really like her. That sounds like we have sex, we do not, well, not with each other.

And finally an update for those regular, loyal blog readers (who don't leave me half as many comments as Lucy Robinson gets on her blog - not that I check regularly), there have been some developments in the decorating department chez moi. We divorced our painters because they ignored anything we asked, painted over blobs of filler without sanding them down and gave us Mafiosa style threats in hushed tones like; "Just so you know, I don't answer to no-one, I'm me own guv'"  whilst promptly answering to all and sundry on their mobiles.

We'll be patching over the botches for a while but at least we're not sleeping with the fishes. Although, at the rate our taps are leaking from the dodgy plumbing job under the bath, we may well be soon.


 
 

• Next entry
• Previous entry