Amanda Knox? Is she a friend of yours?

Posted by Katy Regan at 00:00 on 6 Dec 2009

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Aaaand... relax.It's been one of the most hectic weekends this year. On Friday, I gave a ‘careers talk' to a bunch of sixth formers. It was sort of research for my book. One of the characters is a seventeen year old and since it's been quite a while since I was seventeen  - like BROS were big and so was my hair -  I wanted to meet some, and decided that if I gave a talk to some sixth formers about writing and how I became a writer, they might let me talk to them and pick their brains with some thoroughly middle-aged questions like, "Now, tell me, what are the cool bands these days,?"

Anyway, it was very entertaining. Not least because I had forgotten how young these sixth form types are. I began my talk - with anecdotes and jokes aplenty - and they at first looked at me with ‘that' look; you know the one? The I-am-finding-this-quite-interesting-but-am-damned-if-I'm-going-to-show-it-or move-one-facial-muscle?. Quite intimidating, I can tell you.

They perked up a bit when I told them I used to go to stage school with Posh - there was an eyebrow or too raised then,  a twitch of the mouth. When it came to the bit where I asked them questions though, you couldn't shut them up. This was the funniest bit for me. One of my questions (designed to get maximum research material for my book) was, "What do you talk about with your friends on a night out?" 

One smart Alec said, "Well if any of us had a bird, then we might discuss if she had a fat arse and a nice face, or a face like the back of the bus and a nice arse." Quite the charmer!
 
"Lovely," I said, "Now what if you went to a dinner party with a load of thirty-somethings - What would you expect them to discuss?"

They gave this some very serious thought. "The recession" they said, soberly.  "Gordon Brown? Politics, definitely."

X Factor, more like I thought. And if any of them had a bird, whether she had a face like the back of a bus.

I really did enjoy it though. My friends have started to take the piss that I am now a  professional motivational speaker. That I am a one woman Landmark Forum and shall soon be invited to talk at dinner dances and charity functions. Turning on Berkhamsted Christmas lights this year? The world's my oyster!

So that was Friday. I came out buzzing, if it were not for the trillion other things I had to do last weekend like make Fergus a tabbard for his nativity play and celebrate his fifth birthday on Sunday.  
Saturday, my parents came down, which was an entertainment in itself. My mum's  so funny. I was going on about Amanda Knox and her recent conviction (I admit to being slightly obsessed with this story.) " Foxy Knoxy, she's going down"!" I said, whilst reading all about it in the Telegraph. Mum looked at me, "Who's Amanda Knox?" she said. "Do you know her?" I nearly died laughing.  
"I don't think so mum" I said. "She's a convicted murderess."

"Oh" she said. "It's just the way you were talking it sounded like she was a friend of yours."

Mum's excuse for not having heard of one of the most notorious characters in possibly one of the most notorious news stories of this year was that she's a very busy woman who has choir practice several times a week, Christmas shopping to do - I mean when would she get chance to set eyes on a newspaper?! Bless her.

Can't complain though, she did me proud with the tabard she made for Fergus, a tour de force made out of a Waitrose green tablecloth.

Of course when I took it into school on Monday I kept quiet that this was none of my own handiwork (it IS a competition after all). "Can't believe they expect us just to whip up a tabard out of thin air," I said to another mum. "Think yourself lucky," she said, "My daughter's a camel."

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