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It's cathartic to off-load sometimes

Posted by Katy Regan at 11:42 on 27 Feb 2008

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Thank God for Karen (thank you Karen!) and her wise words after Monday's little rant where I basically spewed all my little worries onto the page with uninhibited abandon. It was cathartic, I tell you. Sometimes a good bit of off-loading is exactly what’s needed.

Karen made such a brilliant, helpful point which was that I should stop over-analysing everything (I need to find that book I have somewhere: Women Who Think Too Much!!) and have faith that the right man will take me as I come – son, friendship with father of son, neuroses, inability to build flat-pack furniture etc etc.

She said exactly what I needed to hear, it was a verbal slap around the face, a ‘pull yourself together and stop naval gazing’ message wrapped up in kind, sensible words. And she used a very important phrase; ‘go with the flow’. I SO need to learn that and stop worrying incessantly about things that haven’t even happened yet. After all, as she says, it may be that there’s a man out there worrying about exactly the same issues as me.

Everyone’s worrying about something, after all. I think it’s probably wise to remember that.

Katy Regan
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Not quite the same situation (no child involved!) but one of my best mates and I have had that friendship and sex thing, but after quite a few years we still don't want a relationship with each other, but don't want to give up our friendship... and both know that for a relationship to work someone would have to accept that our friendship is always going to be there and not feel threatened by it!

Whilst I'm still waiting to be swept off my feet, he on the other hand has recently found a very lovely lady friend who he is head of heels for, and she doesn't have a problem with our close friendship nor if on the odd occassion I need to steal him away to be my 'date' to a party (of course there's no more sex these days!!! That WOULD be weird!)

Ultimately you can't get to your late twenties or early thirties without having formed close and lasting relationships, and anyone new on the scene by this point in your life should expect at least a little baggage.

It's renewed my belief that there are definitely a few people out that don't think in black and white, and understand that we're in the 21st Century with all it's weird and wonderful relationships!
Comment by Helen on February 29 12:36

Hi-it's Karen again here. Glad I was of help but want to highlight it was meant in a caring agony aunt kinda way, said with a lovely soothing voice. Love the column, can't wait for the book and thanks for the mention I'm blushing in my 5 seconds of fame.
Comment by Karen on February 29 13:35